Umph.

It's 1:38 in the morning and I am listening to somethin bout,...people. LoL. I am P-A-T-H-E-T-I-C and I feel it. LoL. It's weird how I'm content even though I feel like shit. I broke up with my boyfriend roundabout 3 months ago and I haven't had anything serious or really liked a guy since, understandable right? Well, my friends who literally just broke up/got broke up with are goin on to new guys and are insisting on acting like lil school girls bout it. Like they have never flirted with a guy or the guys with them,... I love them both but I just don't understand. I sat there and comforted one of them while they were crying and asking me why their guy had left and I couldn't give her a good answer cause in truth it was her fault. She had cheated with his friend and told him and he stayed with her and then she had the damn balls to ask him if they could take a break. I didn't know what to say then and now aint much better. But no worries, she moved on to another one of her ex's friends, who just so happends to be a jerk major. Her ex is amazing. He is truly for the Lord and he would have treated her right and he would have supported her. She gave it up and all I do is wish I was like her. I know that if I was her I wouldn't have givin him up for the reasons she gave to me. He wasn't this and he wasn't that. I just wish I was as,... naive as her sometimes. Then maybe I could make the mistakes of a teen. I grew up way to fast, thrown into the grownup world way to early. Now that I have a chance to venture forth into that unknown world I have no idea how to give up my knowledge to learn what they know. I'm a virgin, and not because I'm "waiting" for the right guy,... that aint as important to me as the "right" time. If a girl aint ready then she'll never be the same in a really bad way. I just want somethin good. I'm easy to please, really. I aint a grump pot. I aint psycho. I'm the main person people run to, from my family to my friends. I have to give them advice and make sure they aint gonna do anythin "stupid". My groups notorious for that, lol. It's ok though I just need somewhere that I can go to vent my own steam. I won't say any names or anythin, just situations. This is the real life of an American teenager & I aint prego. That show just shows B.S. stuff that don't usually happen. IDK though,... my school is different I guess. But were a small town and things definatly don't stay a secret or hidden for long. Close knit community don't even begin to cover it.